I couldn't sleep so I decided to get up and write. Catch all of you up on our life, my thoughts and our girl. It is early morning here in the Sharp house. Everyone is still sleeping, I have an awesome cup of iced coffee beside me and my sweet Lucy dog is under the table with her sweet head resting on my feet.
We got an update on Everly a few days ago and her favorite color is red. Be still my heart. She is still just as tall as she was last December. Her weight has remained the same as well. A whopping 39 pounds. Who knows if it is really accurate at this point. I have a hard time believing she hasn't gained a single pound in almost a year. She is tiny, that is for sure.
This update was slim, with just height, weight, favorite color and the knowledge that she doesn't really know what adoption is. Which is no surprise really. They haven't officially told her that we are coming for her as we are waiting on one single piece of paper to be able to officially tell her.
We usually get two or three pictures with each update. This time there wasn't a single one. We aren't guaranteed any pictures, but they are usually provided. They said they would send them at another time. My heart dropped as I thought of the million reasons there were no pictures. Was she okay, was she sick, where is my girl?!?!? I need to see her face and make sure she is okay!
A few days later, Monday night in fact, I see her face. Her sweet precious face. And as it seems, she has two front teeth :) For a while there that tooth was missing. I thought for sure that tooth had been knocked out somehow. But her teeth are there and her smile is to die for.
Two days later we get an email from our agency that they have a video.
The most precious 45 seconds of the week.
God is good friends. He is faithful, He is close to the brokenhearted. When I feel like I could crawl right out of my skin with worry for Everly He gently eases this mothers heart. Not only with pictures but a video.
He has shown up time and time again in this process. Right at the very moment I feel I am breaking, or I may not make it, or I may go crazy He is there and gently shows himself.
I get so overwhelmed with thoughts at times. Good thoughts, bad thoughts, confusing thoughts, untrusting thoughts.
When we started this process we needed about $16,000.00 to complete this adoption. Yeah. So we just said, a few fundraisers, save like crazy and pray. That is all we could offer. But we were obedient.
We are roughly $2500.00 away from that $16,000.00 mark. We keep saving, we keep praying and we keep trusting.
I am thankful for the people that have made it their job to stand in this HUGE gap for our family. Friends that text and email with words of encouragement and prayers. Friends that have our Everly on their fridge, chalkboard, phone... praying over her safety and our finances.
I am just thankful this morning for a Father that loves me but also loves Everly even more. A Father that wants her home. I am thankful that we said yes to this precious girl. And that we are fighting for her. Yes, she only knows mandarin and only mandarin. We will get through it. She is 9 and has lived in an orphanage in Ch%^$ for 9 years. It is going to be hard. Her emotions will be all over the place and jetlag is going to suck. Integrating into a family of 6 is going to be weird and trying. She is going to grieve. We are going to grieve. It is going to be a hot mess up in here. Probably for a while actually. But we are going to be okay. The same great God that brought us together is also in it for the junky messy stuff. He specializes in redemption and brokenness. And in this creation of messiness he is already redeeming me. In my brokenness and ugliness he is fixing this heart of mine. Making old things new. Turning the sour sweet. I am honored to be stretched and molded. Plucked out of the comfortable and into the unsure. In grieving their past we all grieve. In looking to the sun, we are all warmed and refreshed.
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